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Identifying technology abuse

Technology abuse is serious, and threats made online or in texts are real.

Use this list to think about how your ex-partner is using technology in his efforts to control and intimidate you. Then consider which strategies you need to use to keep you and your children safe and how much outside help (technical expertise, police) you may need.

Keeping a record of this information is also helpful as evidence of abuse for your family law case. Learn more in the Evidence section.

Unwanted communication

  • Repeated texts
  • Abusive texts
  • Repeated phone calls
  • Abusive phone calls
  • Repeated emails
  • Abusive emails
  • Repeated social media messaging
  • Abusive social media messages

 Using others

  • He communicates with the children via social media, text, etc., in order to spy on me.
  • He tells the children bad things about me over social media, texts, etc.
  • He has used shared social media contacts to find out information about me.
  • When he says bad things about me online, other people make supportive comments.
  • His friends and family harass me via social media, phone, text.
  • He has encouraged other people to harass me online.
  • He has access to GPS on my children’s devices.
  • Phone/internet billing account covers children’s devices (this may give him monitoring access).
  • He shares/has access to my email account.


  • He has access to GPS on my phone.
  • He has access to GPS on my car.
  • We share a phone/internet billing account (e.g., Rogers, Bell).
  • He has access(ed) to my phone, laptop, tablet.
  • I have found/suspect there is spyware (hidden software) on my devices.
  • I have found/suspect there are hidden cameras in my home, kids’ toys.
  • He knows more about me than he should.


  • He has, or says he has, sexual photos of me.
  • He posted sexual photos or videos of me online or sent them to others.
  • He pretended to be me in social media, email, etc.
  • He hacked into my account (email, social media, bank, etc.).
  • He says bad/embarrassing things about me online.

 Other considerations

  • Online services report odd account activity.
  • Batteries run low quickly on my device(s).
  • He has sent me or the children strange files to download.
  • I am concerned about his access to the children’s accounts.
  • The children tell me he wants information about me.
  • Social media contacts tell me he wants information about me.
  • People have forwarded things he has said about me.
  • I have decreased my online activities.

I have changed my:

  • Phone number
  • Email account

I have closed:

  • Social media accounts
  • Email accounts

I don’t like to:

  • Go online
  • Answer my phone
  • Check texts
  • Check email

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